Grillerin'

Pa came over today, and pa-in-law.. he brought his female friend. This as great, considering I have been holding on to their Las Vegas photos since January. Gah. However, that worked out since handing him the photo album covered part of his pa-day present. Since I have a chef living in my basement, then we lucked in on WHO got to cook today. BWAHHA! "YOU WANNA GO BACK TO LIVING IN YOUR CAR!?! DAMN RIGHT YOU'RE GOING TO GET YOUR ASS INTO THAT KITCHEN!!! NOW SHUT UP AND COOK US SOME STUFF!! AND IT BETTER BE GOOD!! BIATCH!!"... bwahhahahah! He's downstairs crying now.

But a while back GirlNextDoor and her hubby discovered a grill at the curb. Now, since it was 'bulky trash' week, they assumed it was for bulky trash. I think they're crazy and that someone took it out to the driveway to wash it.. and basically they stole it... but, regardless, I HAVE A NEW GRILL! My last one sucked. I bought it at a garage sale and if I remembered where I would drive by and hurl it through their front window. It didn't have a thing which stopped all of the charcoal from falling through the bottom. And, I had to use charcoal because.. well, other than that I fear fire or exploding propane tanks.. the first fence-jumping dog we had chewed the cable to the gas. Anyway, long dull story short.. GirlNextDoor and her hubby stole someone's really super awesome grill out of their driveway.. and gave it to us :) Mainly because I'm pathetic and can't grill cuz my grill was crap. It's shiny and pretty and has 3 little grilly things to put food on inside. There is a clicky button which starts FIIIIRE.. and even a side burner incase I want to .. like... cook a pot of something. I don't know. But it's neat and free and my neighbors are the best. Not only the ones that steal, but also the ones that are silly enough to leave kick-ass grills outside to be stolen.

However, I was also wondering, what if they just didn't want it anymore because something icky happened in it? Like they cut up their cable installer guy and ate him.. after grilling him on this grill? That's bad. Right? And no, those are not my cigarettes in the photo. The whole idea of someone smoking while cooking for me makes me annoyed. And yes, those are pots of herbs on the bench. They're going to the back yard to be planted tomorrow, along with the grill. It belongs on the back deck, but I couldn't convince anyone to take it there today. Slackers. Like it's fuckin' Father's Day or some shit. I'll be glad when I can get back to bossing his ass around again tomorrow!! I mean, HE was in VEGAS on Mother's Day. Did I complain?!?! Well, yes. I did, actually. I don't care if it was work. I don't know when watching women spin on brass poles became WORK?? I don't care if he IS the brass pole inspector. I realize someone has to make sure they are kept clean and up to codes.. but on Mother's Day?? I think someone is lying to me. Why haven't I met his employer? Why is he always paid in casino chips or buffet comps at shady dirty casinos? Why doesn't he get a W2? I really should ask him these questions....