Thursday, July 05, 2007
Perhaps not such a good idea
2 Children, 1 Adult Die After Van Rolls Into Connecticut Pond
Case of Missing Colorado Woman Paige Birgfeld Baffles Investigators
Girl Seriously Injured in Swimming Pool Mishap as Drain Pump Sucks Out Her Intestines
Boy, 10, in Critical Condition After Father Slits His Throat
Boating Accident in Tennessee Lake Kills 2 Children
So... nevermind. Sometimes I'd just rather not know. Otherwise Monkey would never be allowed near a pool again, I would never drive near bodies of water, I would have all knives removed from my home.... need I go on??????
Some July 4th Photos
I didn't take too many photos yesterday. I find I spend most of my time playing with my camera trying to get great shots.. of fireworks I'll never look at again :) But, I did take photos of our stash. I asked Monkey, "College or Fireworks?".. so... :) We did have an excellent time yesterday. I did take some photos of this really freaky guy that showed up in a speedo.. I'll post them once I have the desire to download them :) Egads! And more on THAT story later :)


July 4th Party
Daytime = make loud noises
By the way, the reaction Monkey has at the end of the video was from some FREAK that ran through our yard in a patriotic speedo!! AH! OK, actually, he started laughing as soon I stopped the video. He was playing.
Sadly the sound of the explosion didn't come through, but they were loud! I know, we're the neighbors that most people hate. However, we had a LOT of competition this year! It sounded like a war zone!
Monday, July 02, 2007
Wretched dogbeast
Needless to say, I'm tired of giving him a chance and he will be going back to the shelter. I've spent a small fortune on electric fences, an indoor electric border for the front door and a remote control shocker for when I was BORED! I didn't use it for long, it didn't phase him. Other than pleasing my evil side when he wouldn't come.. while chasing him through the neighborhood, it really didn't serve a purpose. He's not a bad dog, just not my kind of dog. He doesn't like being here, and I'm tired of people getting hurt. Not to mention he chewed on the arm of another neighbor that tried to bring him home. Luckily he likes us :)
Buh-bye Roscoe. Sorry it didn't work out. I'm a bad person, I know. We'll take you back to the nice little doggy shelter where they cuddle you and find you a good home.. not those animal killer ones. Promise. And we'll be sure to suggest that your next owner have a 20' fence and no doors! When your previous owners returned you for being an escape artist, I should have paid attention. We live and learn. I want a dog that wants to be a part of the family, not one that wants to plot his escape. At least Tara will be happy you're gone.. she's such a mean ol' dog :) She won't have to share her pillows anymore :)
Sunday, July 01, 2007
Crusty Grime, Sticky Residue and Cheeze Puffs!
BUT!! These people are pigs. And I mean it! They have a layers of unidentified grime. Windows that look like they haven't been washed in years. Dirt build-up on the floors. Stains on their couches which I don't even see at the thrift store! Just grotesque. One girl had pieces of food piled up on the end of her bed post. To the point that the sticky-ness of it all made it hard to remove. GAH!!! I just want to hurl!
Yes, I am a mess. But my home won't give you 14 different types of diseases! However, it is fun to sift through :) I'm like the old Aunt with the attic. Ton's of odd strange eclectic things everywhere :) It comes from being married to a freak. Speaking of, I'm doing his work today and I HATE HIM! I have to do these messages and this woman calls in and she has the MOST negative and annoying voice. I have never met her, but when I do I swear I'm going to hit her! She bitches about everyone and everything. I think she feels our voicemail is her best friend! And based on what I know of her just from voicemail, it probably is! Don't negative people ever get the hint that nobody wants to be around them? And to change?!?!
Oh well. Back to listening to her voice. And watching this show on mute. Prolly best on mute, I don't really want to know what I'm listening to. When I did have volume on, one couple said they wash their sheets every 12 weeks or so. I passed out :)
Chuckle du jour
OK. Seriously. MK mentioned her on DListed, and this came up as an alternative video. Why don't I have back-up dancers in Speedo's??
Thursday, June 28, 2007
Yummy Experiment
Made my first pizza evahhh today. I don't actually like pizza, but because I'm not a big fan of gooey pastry smothered in red sauce. So I thought it would be fun to try my hand in this whole pizza thing. I bought that pre-made pastry that comes in a tin? Rolled it out on my round stone.. to find it's rectangular. Doh!! So I cut off the excess and made some un-pretty crust. Baked it a bit, then added the toppinz. I used a 4 cheese pasta sauce.. just a smooodge. Then added shredded 5 cheese blend and added Havarti. Oh yeahh. Some seasonings... sliced tomatoes.. Canadian bacon, pepperoni, bacon and more cheese. It was actually very good. MrNV, the lackey and I scarfed it down :)
Because...
Rules: Use the 1st letter of your name to answer each of the following. They MUST be real places, names, things…NOTHING made up! If you can’t think of anything, skip it.Try to use different answers if the person before you had the same 1st initial.You CAN’T use your name for the boy/girl name question.
Your Name: ~Lorraine~
1. Famous Singer/Band: Louis Armstrong
2. 4 letter word: Lick
3. Street: Lombard
4. Color: Lime
5. Gifts/Presents: Lottery Tickets
6. Vehicle: Lexus, cuz Chal wants one
7. Things in a Souvenir Shop: Lame Stuff
8. Boy Name: Lucien .. I love that name. Cuz nobody would let me name my son Damien I tried for Lucien, but that got the nix also. I don't even like scary movies, the whole evil reference makes me mad! However, had I given birth to twins they couldn't have stopped me :)
9. Girl Name: LaFawnduh .. yes, from Napoleon Dynamite :)
10. Movie Title: Love American Style .. or was that a series? Wow. Flashback. Do you remember the bed on the beach???
11. Drink: Long Island Tea
12. Occupation: Loofah Tester
13. Celebrity: Lindsay Lohan (sorry, but it had 2 L's)
14. Magazine: Life
15. U.S. City: Lincoln
16. Pro Sports Teams: Lakers
18. Reason for Being Late for Work: Landing airplane because pilot died
19. Something You Throw Away: Lost Sock Orphans
20. Things You Shout: Loser!
21. Cartoon Character: Liger (sorry, couldn't resist)
Stuck in my brain
I keep hearing this song in some commercial and now I can't get it out of my headddd!!! And songs just sound better in French :)
Monday, June 25, 2007
Silly Girlie
Oh, and the boys and I tortured MissA by making her dance in order to get back into the van. BWAHAHHA! OK, going to sleep now. Bust-a-moooooove!
Gahhhh...
BTW, MissA, click on the image for a LARRRGER version of THE BOY! Egads :)
Sunday, June 24, 2007
Buzzing through my head..











Friday, June 22, 2007
Hardy-Har :)
A woman from Los Angeles, who was a tree hugger and an anti-hunter, purchased a
piece of timberland. There was a large tree on one of the highest points in the
tract. She wanted a good view of the natural splendor of her land so she started
to climb the big tree. As she neared the top she encountered a spotted owl that
attacked her. In her haste to escape, the woman slid down the tree to the ground
and got many splinters in her crotch. In considerable pain, she hurried to the
nearest doctor. She told him she was an environmentalist and an anti-hunter and
how she came to get all the splinters. The doctor listened to her story with
great patience and then told her to go into the examining room and he would see
if he could help her. She sat and waited three hours before the doctor
reappeared. The angry woman demanded, "What took you so long?" He smiled and
then told her, "Well, I had to get permits from the Environmental Protection
Agency, the Forest Service and the Bureau of Land Management before I could
remove old-growth timber from a recreational area. I'm sorry, but they turned me
down."
Thursday, June 21, 2007
So it's done.
You know. My family really is shit. And I don't even just mean the jackass brother. He's an alcoholic, part of me understands it's beyond his control. I guess. However that works. But the reason I kept calling the police yesterday was to get my brother arrested. Not only because I was worried about him killing someone, but also because he has no place to go will just sit in his car passed out. He's 50. After so many years of drinking, he's not in the best of health. I know he can become dehydrated. But this time I wasn't going to cater to him by bringing drinks. It needed to be resolved. He needs to get help, and I guess reach rock bottom. He's been through rehab enough times, it's not working. But I couldn't sleep lastnight or the night before. I worry about him, regardless of how angry I am. But this is my shit-tastic family.Mom: After going on and on about how she's tired of it all, she basically did nothing. This morning when my brother arrived at 8:30 my husband called their house to have my step father come over for support. Of course, when he left there he was all gung-ho and pissed and going to rip him a new ass.. bla bla bla. When he arrived, he just stared at Adrian. Not that I wanted a rumble, but I think he's in it for the fun of watching. He doesn't care, and has done nothing in the past to help my brother. They did drive by my house yesterday and noticed my brother passed out in his car. Instead of stopping to see if I needed help for whatever... they just went on home. I heard later that they had seen him there. ?? And today I can't reach them.. they're at the casino.
The only sister I talk to: Yesterday she was put out that I called her while she was getting her manicure/pedicure. She actually said, "Here I'm trying to be all richie-bitchie, and I'm having to talk about my drunk brother." WHAT? She then went to Andre's.. which is a French pastry shop. She also bitched lastnight that she hoped he didn't show up there because 'what would the neighbors say' about a drunk parked in front of her house. Today she went to some luncheon with 1200 other cronies, and got home a bit ago. Never called me all day to see if everything was alright, or if I had heard from our brother. I told her he was arrested, "For what?" she asked. PROSTITUTION, WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU THINK???? But she couldn't be bothered.
I'm upset he's in jail. But I know that he will get medical attention if he needs it. He will have a place to sleep, food and water. It sucks. I know. I wouldn't want to be there. But, he brought it on himself. I packed up his clothing today and found 4 bottles of Jose Cuervo Especial.. empty. Big bottles, says 375ML. I know that he drank all of them between Monday evening and Tuesday. That's not someone that wants help.
So yes. I called 911 this time. I believe he was on the border where the more ABLE police station gets involved. I told a white lie and said that I watched him leave a nearby restaurant and drive in his car.. then pass out in the parking lot. I watched from across the street and 4 police cars and a paddy wagon eventually came and took him away. And his car was towed. I feel like an asshole, I do. I'm sorry I had to call the police. But I simply didn't see an alternative. It was that or let him die in his car?? He lost his wallet. He had no money, no ID nothing on him.
It's an end I guess. By pointing out what jerks my family members are, I'm not asking for accolades. I'm not a great person. I can be quite a bitch, actually. But I guess I'm typing this out to help my brain understand I did the right thing. I hope. Because I feel like total shit about it. But nobody else was willing to do a thing. They like to get angry.. but do nothing.
I want to cry
"Well, we're on black-out"
"And that means?"
"There are no available officers."
So, great. Screwed again. Nothing ever goes on up here, why are we in black-out? Is there a party somewhere? I drive by QuikTrip and there are usually no less than 7 officers parked and hanging out. Yet I can't get one person to actually put forth any sort of effort to arrest my piece of shit brother. And I feel bad enough even having to call the police because he IS my brother. But if something happens then I will feel responsible. But I'm also tired of being the one to take the keys rendering me basically responsible for his ass. I'm just so frustrated. I feel like I am enabling him to kill someone by not taking his keys. But at the same time, if he isn't caught, then they won't arrest him. Why does it have to reach this point? Clearly he's driving. He obviously doesn't live at fucking Goodyear. That is not his driveway. I thought if you were drunk and behind the wheel, that was intent and you could be arrested. Turns out it isn't so.
I'm just angry. I'm mad that I can't get any cooperation from the police in this tiny area. I slammed the door on them this morning because one guy actually laughed. "Oh, I remember that guy from the grocery parking lot." Is it fucking funny? Because I don't think so. I told them that I'd just wait to call once someone is dead and then perhaps I could get some help.
At this point I'm going to just go and sit at Quik Trip. When I see my brother driving off, then I will call 911. Because that's all I can do to get anything accomplished with these people. Fucking useless.
Thursday Download

You know I love you. I am sorry that I only mention you when I'm hostile. Over the last few days there has been a lot of drama with Jackass brother. I try to be patient with him. And when I have no patience for him, I at least try to give him a place to recover. But I have hit a wall. My point behind not allowing him into my home was always because of Monkey. We try to raise him in a normal home, no drama. We don't drink, we're not addicts of anything and we try to set a good example. I allowed him to stay here because he had no place else to go. He was drunk and sitting in his car in a grocery store parking lot. So with the help of our wonderful neighbors, we managed to get his car parked in front of our house.. where we could watch him and make sure he didn't DIE! After almost 2 days he could walk and we let him stay in the basement. Bought an inflatable mattress.. got it all set up nicely for him. Nicer than a fuckin' car pissing himself. Of course he missed work, but his boss is so very understanding. At any rate, after about 6 days of staying here he started to avoid me last Tuesday. He had Sunday, Monday and Tuesday off because he had a long work week coming up to cover for some guy going on vacation. His jackass girlfriend called him Monday because she wanted him to drive her to the hospital to see her mother. She's just as useless as he is. Either break up or don't, but don't just call when it's convenient for you. So I think that because she dropped him off here Monday night and didn't let him go home with her, he decided to drink. Well, that and because he's a jackass. So on Tuesday I figured he was just busy with her drama and didn't think much about it. Until I realized that instead of coming in the front door, he was sneaking around through the back door next to the garage. And I became angry, but ignored it. He can be a dick when he's sober, not too social. Late that night around 10:15 Monkey and I decided to toss the telescope into the van and go to a clear area to see if we could see the moon. And I wanted to see if we could possibly pick up the space station, I had read that backyard telescopes were picking it up in some areas. But.. alas.. cloudy. We returned around 11:10 to find Jackass in the kitchen stumbling around like a total moron. I placed the telescope in the dining room and I could tell he was startled. He stumbled out of the kitchen in his robe, barely able to walk. I noticed shit ALL over the counter, and food all down the front of his robe.
"What are you doing?".. I asked while trying to give him the benefit of a doubt
"Hmm..huh??"... he mumbled fuckin' drunk out of his gourd
So.. I went off. Sent Monkey to the office and lost my mind. I haven't screamed so much.. since the last time I screamed at his useless piece of shit ass. Basically chased him downstairs, made him put some clothes off and shoved him out of the door. He passed out in his car.
I'm not a cold person, as the other sibling that I don't speak to likes to say I am. I just have zero tolerance for stupidity. I really don't. If he actually wanted help and was trying to improve his life, then I would be more than happy to help him. But when that piece of shit knows he has no other options.. and he brings alcohol into my home? No fucking way. He's a jackass. I have been on the phone repeatedly with the police since yesterday afternoon. I feel guilty for not taking his keys, but I didn't realize he was so stupid that he would leave the front of my house. It was a bad call on my part. And the police won't do anything about it. He managed to drive to his ex-girlfriends house and all they did was take him to a local hotel. It's pathetic. And he was at my door again this morning at 8:30. I know his stupid girlfriend probably picked him up this morning and took him to his car, because she doesn't want him or his things there. So he came straight to my house, looking for his wallet because he lost it. But not here. I figured he'd stay at the hotel and sleep it off.. but no. And he's still stumbling around. So I called the police again... and nothing. Instead of driving around looking for him, they're lecturing me on how I need to file restraining orders. Which isn't the fucking point. I want him OFF THE STREET. I don't care if he's passed out on my fucking lawn, I don't want him behind the wheel. And to just totally finish me off. Lastnight I thought I'd charge his cell, so he could at least make calls. And I wanted to delete my information from his contacts, and photos of Monkey he had taken with the camera. And when it powers up.. what is the fucking screen saver on the phone? His member. Fully erect.. with my comforter in the background that he was using in the basement. And I know it wasn't on there Monday because that's when he took the photo of Monkey. So this is what that useless piece of shit was doing Tuesday while drunk. And when I went into the photos to delete Monkey, there were 2 of his dog... 2 of his ex... 1 of Monkey and about 6 of his only best friend in the world. The thing with which he obviously does most of his thinking. I mean, how old is he? 50! I would expect that from some 17 year old boy that thought it was funny or something. But there is something just not right in his head.
So he's gone. And I'm feeling angry, guilty, pissed and disgusted. I thought that today would be a non-uncle kind of day for Monkey, yet there he was laying on my doorbell at 8:30 this morning like there was a fucking fire. Actually getting mad at ME because I didn't know where his wallet was. It's not my fault he stumbles around drunk and loses things.
Well, I'm done now. Thank you, journal, for listening to my banter. I know I brought this on myself, I allowed him to stay here. After he ruined my home while we were on vacation last Spring. And while he has used and abused every member (except Mother) of this family. I get it.. "told ya so". But I always hope, ya know? I think that 'this will be the time'.. because he has no other options. But it makes no difference to him. And I wash my hands of him.
Wroops...
After having a completely shit-tastic day, complements of my jackass brother, I took the kiddies to see 'Nancy Drew'. It was actually kinda cute. Now I'm going to go to bed and hope that tomorrow brings great things. I'm having lunch with pa, so that should at least be interesting and provide a few good chuckles. And my sister bought me some pastries from Andre's today, so that's always a bonus. I'll have to buzz by and pick them up!! Hopefully my jackass brother won't show his face 'round here no more. And again, I remember why Monkey is an only child. Out of 3 siblings, I could do without 2 of them completely and my life would be sparkly and happy.
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Do you remember that movie?
These photos just make me chuckle. Can you not just be NORMAL when you're famous? Do you remember that movie, I believe from the 80's, where the world is being taken over by aliens? I think that wrestler was in it, Roddy Piper? And he discovered that if you wore these special glasses you could see fellow aliens and it would also show you subliminal messages like 'obey' and 'submit' hidden on TV and advertising signs. It was a really bad movie, but we watched it anyway :) Seriously, this looks like a snapshot of that movie. Everyone around them.. completely normal. Laughing... talking to each other.. no glasses... just normal people. And then .. there's Tom, Posh and Tom's robot. And the photo of Posh walking down the stairs with her son. For starters, does she realize he's not yet 6'2"? Does she just want to dislocate his arm? Or is she using him for balance??? And I love the expression of the guy with the glasses. Do people just dress differently at a soccer game??? I wasn't aware it was a 'party frock' event :) And that photo is again evidence that they are aliens. Because her head is lurking forward, just like the monster from 'Alien'. I know you know what I'm talking about! Why won't the government just out them already?!?! Why am I the only one that notices these things? By posting this... am I going to vanish tomorrow? Shit. Save yourselves!!!! I know there is a pod waiting under my bed!!**UPDATE!!**
It came to me, I remember now. It was titled 'They Live'!!! Rent it, because it will surely give us information on how to defeat them!! I thought I'd have my way with the original movie cover :) You know you think he's an alien!!! Don't deny it!!


Is it just me??!
I guess I'm getting cheap in my old age, but is Panera Bread expensive?? Like silly expensive? Sorta like a $4 cup of coffee?? Or is it just me? Today Monkey and I were running errands and I thought we'd go to Panera .. it has been a while. Pft! Basically I ordered a sandwich with turkey, cheese and bacon. It came with chips. Monkey had the kids meal of a turkey and cheese sandwich which came with a small drink. I think it was supposed to have yogurt, but didn't. I wasn't in the mood to ask about it. And I ordered a medium drink.. which was a petite medium :) Our total came to $13.76. I gave Monkey my chips just because I felt bad his lunch was so lame. I dunno. Maybe it's me. Is it all because it's organic or something? I can feed a family of 3 for the same price at Subway, and that includes chips. Just silly. And it wasn't that great. I get it, I like the exotic breads. But is the mark-up that necessary? His sandwich had a slice of cheese and turkey, no mayo.. just dry. We had to use tear-open packages of Hellmans. I don't mind if I'm paying $3.00 for a street vendor sandwich or something! Heck, we could have been served at Chili's for the same price. Oh well. Maybe it's just me. Or, maybe I was being charged for all that fluffy excessive paper under the sandwich that they use to make it look more impressive? Unless I'm eating fish and chips in the UK, I hate being served on paper. Am I 6??


