I'm watching you..

Yeah, I was goofing around with my macro. I found some cool photos on Flickr that people had taken of their eyes, and wanted to give it a whirl. I gaussed it a bit to get red of all the REDDD. Just wanted to see the colors. Ever since I was a kid I had fun looking in the mirror up close.. opening and closing my eye. Watching the colors burst and shrink over and over :) Simple minds are easily amused.

So I get my new free TV. Yes, free :) Because there are perks in being a brass pole inspector, other than free lap dances. So MrNV allowed me to put it in the office :) It is a 40" flatscreen Sony Bravia. And I am in love. We have HDTV in the living room, but not a nifty flatscreen :) And I believe it's only 32" or 38" or something. So I upgraded my cable box in here, and adore the HDTV channels! I want MORE! I can't even watch the normal channels now.. eew! And it has that recording thingy so I can record shows I miss. And it remembers... so that after I remember what I forgot.. it's in the little list box so I can watch it! YES! I only record Conan actually, because I really like him and he's always on after I go to bed. Cuz I'm old. And senile.

The family did great at Christmas. I actually saw my bitch sister that I haven't talked to much for the last few years. Now she's calling and sending me emails like we're friends again. Yes, I ignore them :) Then I pull out the 6 page letter again she cc'd to the entire family on what assholes we are. Me: the cold hearted bitch. I'll have to post the letter someday, it's actually sort of amusing. My dad went straight to his lawyer with a copy of the letter. So, when he passes away it will be tragic.. yet fun :) I sure hope there is a video! I'll put it on Youtube for y'all!

Speaking of, still working on getting him moved in. I had hoped to get him here by December, didn't pan out. I empty out the room to get ready, and MrNV puts more shit back into it. It's like the black hole of stuff. It's gonna suck for Dad when he's in there, cuz he'll vanish under all the useless things we accumulate.

I think I'm allergic to peanuts. Or, peanits as MrNV calls them. Thank God it's not chocolate! But my 'allergies' have been doing good, but kicking in off an on. Yesterday I bought a jar of dry roasted peanuts and munched on them lastnight. I was hacking up a lung by the time I went to bed. Wheezing for hours. And smart child says, "You're allergic to nuts, mom.". Wuhhh? And of course, today I feel fine. I've always loved nuts, they're the perfect snack food. And I think MrNV has mentioned I'm possibly allergic before. But I didn't think about it so much before. Or maybe I knew and keep forgetting?!?! Over the holidays I was munching on them too.. and would randomly have bad 'allergy' attacks and would curse the outdoors. Might not be it at all! I tell ya... your body sure falls apart as you get older.

OH! And I took Monkey to Cracker Barrel lastnight for dinner. They had a stand of Valentine's cards, and I found the PERFECT card to send to my neighbor Mr. Squirrel Killer! Bwahhaha! I will scan it and post it later. There are 2 actually. I'm going to send them as being 'From The Squirrels'. Bwahahaha! Maybe I should put 'The Woods' as the return address? I'll post the info later and y'all can give me smartass ideas :)

XOXOXO
L

Happy New Year Bitches!!! XOXOXO

I'm sorry I am a bad blogger. I'm the biggest slacker in the world. It sucks for me too, cuz when I'm browsing my blog next year I won't know what I was doing around Christmas :) Suffering most likely.

MrNV is in Vegas again, so I'll find some time this week. Should I be concerned that this weekend was the AVN awards?!??! I bet those brass poles were busy this weekend!!! Wheeeee! Maybe he'll get overtime :) He said you can definitely tell the porn stars from the regular hookers in the casinos :) Bwahahaha. I need to shorten that leash :)

Is it also strange that I keep playing 'The Humpty Dance' over and over .. and over... and over.... I need help.

Won the 'ultimate poker player' trophy in Puzzle Pirates :) I'm working hard to master the whole Texas Holdem' thingy by the Kentucky Derby party this year. I want to take everyone's money!!!! Monkey wanted me to upload some photos of us in Puzzle Pirates. I don't know how to screen freeze, so you git what ya git :) Our shack is pretty sad :) But we're matchy-matchy :)

XOXOXOXOX

From Les Monkey...

Monkey Boy did this at school, and wanted me to post it to the blog to see if anyone can guess all of the Christmas songs in the image. No cheating! Santa is watching!! :)

...giggle..

I saw this on Talk Soup the other day. Someone uploaded it to Youtube. It's not very good quality, but keracks me up!! I know, because my mind is in the gutter.

Meteor Shower

If you're not going to have kerappy snowing clouds like we are tonight, then you might want to check out the Meteor shower. Dress warm, as it won't rock-n-roll until really late! I remember a few years ago we took the Monkey and all went to a field and sprawled out on the ground. It was FREEZING!

Details HERE.

Bad.. but...

I know, it's a bad thing that he is the way he is... but he's just so doggone cute! I just wanna pinch him! And pinch him... and pinch him...

*click here for the story*

LOLOLlolol

OK, so I am watching 'The View' today. Because I need the abuse. I guess yesterday this conversation went on where the new girl Sherri Shepherd argued that Jesus came before the Romans and Greeks. Egads. So today Babawawa is pimping her show 'Most Interesting People'.. and Sherri asked, "Why not Britney Spears? She's interesting?" and Babawaawwaa said, "Well, we try to interview people that do positive things.".. and Sherri just sparked back, "What did POSH do??"

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!

Bababwwaaha totally ignored her, and now she's sitting there like a disgruntled 8 year old. And I have one of those, I know the look. SO FUNNY! She is SO going to get the lecture, and she knows it. One of those, "Wait until I get you home.." looks. BWAHAHAH!

Don't get me wrong, I actually like the new girl. She seems humble and silly and she is the only one that makes me chuckle. And Whoopi is fine, she's 150% better than Rosie. She may not agree with everyone else's opinion, but she will stop an argument (aka Joy ranting and shooting her mouth off) so that they can get their point in. I like that, it's what I asked for all along. Babawa I like just because she is such a Diva, and I wish I could be a fly on the wall of her office. I just love catching those cutting looks she gives the others when they catch her in a lie. AHAHHA

"We like to interview people that do positive things."
"WHAT DID POSH DO??"
BWAHAHAHAHAHAH

I love you Sherri :)

On a happier note.

I know why my dreams are getting to me. I have things going on which annoy me, but can't blog about. I hate to sound like a wanker-whiner :) And Christmas is coming up, which is complete ass. I'm tired of trying to think of Christmas presents for my family.. most of whom I don't even like. Last year they got front row seats to Cirque du Soleil.. this year they'll be lucky if they get a swift kick in the ass.

However, my mother did do a magnificent thing and made us the annual gingerbread house. Last year she was in the UK taking care of nana, so she wasn't able to. It's the biggest she has made us so far! Holy cow! It's gigantor! And she even made a 2nd one for Monkey's class. He was very excited to take it in today. Most likely we're violating some school policy and they will burn it on the front lawn. But it's the thought that counts. And I made my neighbor girly buddy a journal for her birthday.. she turned 13 yesterday :) Happy Belated Birthday MissA!!

Pfft

Today I received another comment on Monkey's video.. and I realized it has been viewed 6,348 times :) Kerazy :)

Dream Log

Again with the bad dreams. Monkey has a little friend, we'll call her Silly. She and I were driving somewhere for some reason, who knows. She needed to go to the bathroom. It is my policy that, even at 8, the Monkey goes into the ladies room in strange places. I don't care what people think, I'm not taking chances. But in my dream, I let her go into the bathroom alone. I have no idea why.. cuz I'm an idiot in my dreams. She's such a bubbly and cute little kid, and will talk to anyone... stupid idea to let her go alone. I could see from outside the door, the bathroom was huge and seemed to be for both men and women. But still I did not enter. After a while I became concerned that she wasn't coming out, so I went in. It was like an entertainment area. There were other 8 year old girls at the back of the room playing, so I went up to ask if they saw her. "Yes, she was dancing with some man. He had balloons, they were awesome! They went that way..."...pointing to a BACK door. So I took off out the back door of this bathroom.. and it opened to a park which overlooked the ocean. There were only about 4 homes, they were huge and up on a cliff. So, of course, I started climbing along the cliff to peek over at the houses. As I peeked over the edge of one, I found a pair of feet in my face. There was a man lying on the ground right at the edge, all wrapped in wire. He was dead and puffy, and smelled horrible. Stupid thing is that I wasn't even shocked, just glad it wasn't Silly. A man saw me, but was upset more that I might be seen by the owner of the house than the fact that I saw this dead body. I climbed up onto the deck and started talking with the butler-y guy, and it seemed I knew the owner because when he walked out he wasn't surprised to see me at all. I don't know who he was, I woke up.

I think tonight I just won't go to bed. I'm tired of the anxiety.

Dream Log

I haven't thought about the dream much that I had lastnight, because it was bad. One of those when you wake up you feel anxious and freaked out. For some reason MrNV was going to Vegas and I was going along. Also my sister, and some 3rd person but I don't know who they were. To save money on the cost of the flight, he was going to put us each in a wooden box and ship us. ?? I just couldn't understand why he was going to do that and he wouldn't explain. I kept telling him that we could just pay for the airfare... nope.

The boxes were more like caskets really. But not nice ones. They made them to size, so there was no room for movement once you were in them. There were sharp edges and nails sticking out. My sister kept explaining over and over and over that the trip was 9 hours and that we wouldn't be able to move for that entire time. No bathroom, no water, no food... arms stuck at your side. And no pillow. I kept thinking to myself, "At least can't I have a pillow?". And we weren't even flying, but MrNV and his Uncle were driving a moving truck.. and our 3 boxes were in the back. WHAT was the point?

I remember waking up short of breath and really pissed at MrNV. I think he apologized, but he's still not forgiven :)

RIP

I remember our family watching Mr. Evel Knievel and his daring stunts :) He rocked. He died today at the age of 69. Much sadness. Imagine the stunts he will take on in Heaven! Woo-hoo!

Cuteness :)

Sirdar posted this really cute story. At first I thought he was serious.. but that's only because I'm mentally challenged.

Click HERE for adorable :)

Pink Floyd - The Great Gig in the Sky (1988)

OK. Even better version. I have goosebumps now :)

The great gig in the sky

One of my favorite things in the world. We got to see Pink Floyd in concert, the last one at Arrowhead Stadium. We were center in VIP seating, with our own restroom! One of my favorite memories ever.. and I love this song.

LOL

OK, this movie preview is not suitable for the kiddies. But seriously, who comes up with stuff like this???? AHAHAHAHAHAHH!

Pleeeease....Don't Squeeze the Charmin

Sadly Mr. Whipple died today. He was 91. ..sigh..

Download

I had some photos to upload. Things I've been taking pictures of but I haven't had time to blog.. so here's a bit of a catch-up!

-Halloween
-My bad angled typical Myspace stupid photo.. but whatever.. from Halloween. Love the horns :) They are hair clips, and so easy to put in. Versus those ones with strings. I thought I put a lot of make-up on, but GirlNextDoor thought I should wear more make-up more often :) I buried her in the yard. The sun was bright in that photo, so you can't really tell. Yes, I only had one tattoo. I ruined the other one by putting it on backwards. Shut up.
-Stuff we picked from the garden before the frost killed em'. My mother wanted the green tomatoes. Not sure what she did with them. And I have no idea what the huge green thing is.
-Birthday cake my brother and sister made for mumsie. I took her to a haunted house.. isn't that what all kids do? Ask her next year what she remembers from her last birthday.. and it will be the haunted house :) You know, with the elderly you have to shock memories into them or they forget ;)
-Cake, with candy corn, my mother made for us. Dots on the cake represent the cat hairs.. just the ones noticeable in the photo. As usual, we didn't eat it.
-My demon dogs greeting me :)
And that's about it :)

It was MrNV's birthday Saturday, but he went to Las Vegas. I know, work. Sure. Whatever. I think that even brass pole inspectors should get days off now and then. But he's 41 now. BWAHAHH! Yes, I know, I turn 40 in February. Don't remind me or I will have you killed.

And no, I can't get the photos to line up properly. Sorry. The only thing I hate MUCH about blogger is how jacked up photos become when you upload them.

Bustin' a tune..

I'm sad that uploading this vide turned it to crap.. as far as video quality. I need to figure out how to host my own videos.. cuz it's now a bunch-o-blurry kids singing Hot Cross Buns :) But Monkey is rockin' the xylophone...yo!

H is for ...

Helicopter: Today there was some par-tay at a cigar shop. They said on the radio that they would have a big heli land, so we went to check it out. Two hours after it was supposed to arrive... voila!

Handsome: Of course .. the pilot was cute and daughter of GirlNextDoor wouldn't stop asking him to marry her.

Hooters: Can you believe I actually had to bribe these boys to get into this shot? Lame.

Havin' Fun: While waiting Monkey had a lot of fun playing frisbee with some other people that were waiting.

Handbags: Bought a new faux Chanel bag today :) ..giggle.. But it is SO cute!